ConceptsNest

***Continued from Chapter 01 (Covered previously: Meaning, Characterestics, Apparance and Manifestation) Link to Chapter -01 Root Causes — And Potential Solutions  Regardless of how or why people may feel like an impostor occasionally, this syndrome is all about the stories that we tell ourselves . We step out with an idea, then when someone says “no,” we retreat and the cycle repeats. The stories may not be true anymore, but they become a habit.  It may happen in school and then in meetings at work. Our ideas get shut down as someone says, “I’ve been here 11 years and that won’t work.” We develop complex coping mechanisms around these stories and deepen the groove in our brain of the thoughts and behaviours, making it very difficult to break the mental connections we’ve made – or to step into our brilliance, whatever it may be. Measuring Impostor Syndrome The first scale designated to measure characteristics of impostor syndrome phenomenon came in 1985, called the Clance impos

What Is Impostor Syndrome? Impostor syndrome (also known as impostor phenomenon, impostor-ism, fraud syndrome or the impostor experience) is a psychological pattern in which an individual doubts their skills, talents, or accomplishments and has a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a "fraud". Impostor syndrome refers to an internal experience of believing that we are not as competent as others perceive us to be . While this definition is usually narrowly applied to intelligence and achievement, it has links to perfectionism and the social context . To put it simply, impostor syndrome is the experience of feeling like a phony —we feel as though at any moment we are going to be found out as a fraud—like we do not belong where we are, and we only got there through dumb luck. It can affect anyone no matter their social status, work background, skill level, or degree of expertise. Impostor syndrome is different from the standard “fake it until you make it” in th

  A deer may be startled by a loud noise and take off through the forest, but as soon as the threat is gone, the deer immediately calms down and starts grazing. And it does not appear to be in anxiety about it later. Let us playact for a moment that we are that deer, living in the grasslands of India. We have slim long feet that help us get into a sprint quickly and pruned senses that pick up signs of danger, a majestic antelope that grabs attention from the group of humans that, every now and then, come driving around on a jungle expedition taking pictures of us. Perhaps the biggest difference between us and our other deer friends, and the humans taking our photograph is that nearly every decision we make (as a deer) provides an immediate benefit to our life . When we are hungry, we walk over and chomp on a bush. When it rains, we shelter under a tree. When we spot a tiger, we run away. Most of our choices as a deer—like what to eat or where to sleep or when to avoid a predator—make

Self-differentiation is a word we probably do not hear in everyday usage. But it is a crucial process to living (and eating) well. It is happening when we hear people speaking their minds with thoughtful conviction even though others might disapprove . It is lacking when someone spends their life rebelling against the views and values of parents/ colleagues and clinging to their opposite. It is missing when someone stifles feelings and thoughts in fear of hurting others or being rejected or shamed by them.     Differentiation of self was defined by Murray Bowen (Psychiatrist, Professor- Georgetown University) in 1978 as the degree to which one is able to balance: (a) emotional and intellectual functioning, and  (b) intimacy and autonomy in relationships . His theory has two major parts. 1) Differentiation of self is the ability to separate feelings and thoughts . Undifferentiated people cannot separate feelings and thoughts; when asked to think, they are flooded with feelings, a

Apologizing to those we have hurt or harmed isn’t always an easy task. There can be various obstacles in our way of doing what is right. Some are: A)   A matter of pride: . . .     To apologize is to set aside our pride long enough to admit our imperfections. For some people, this feels far too vulnerable, too dangerous . It means they have to admit they are flawed and fallible, something they refuse to do. And apologizing also overrides our tendency to make excuses or blame others . This acceptance of responsibility for our own actions is so out of character for some that it is nearly impossible.   B) A sign of weakness: . . .   To many, apologizing reflects weakness. These people have a tendency to need to be right and to always be seen as strong and powerful. But the truth is, apologizing for the harm you caused and taking responsibility for your mistakes can actually be seen as a sign of strength. For example, General Mark Milley recently apologized for appearing in a photo-